Explains it all.

Hood Rich Celebrity of the Day!

I take it big dog was tired of shittin' on every body with just the Gucci links. Getting out of his king size bed every morning, like, "fuck, God. Why am I am so fucking superb?" Homeboy is an innovator! Like, I got this thousand dollar necklace, but how can I cheapen it, add to my own style, make a mockery of everyone else doing anything remotely similar and look like the king fucking chief that I am? Yep, I'm going to go into my little sister's craft room and straight jack a box of coloring crayons... cause that shit'll be CRAY and hopefully no one will notice my gas station knock off sun glasses and fake watch. County fair, here I come!

dat shit cray!

Today's What The Fuck? Photo.

Alright, new installment in this blog. This is where I find a photo with a million questions to be answered and I do my best in breaking it down for you. Feel free to send in pictures that are boggling your mind, confusing to all 6 senses or just some shit you want clarity on. Enough banter, here is today's WHAT THE FUCK photo.

Okay, so I guess it's not a shock to see Cher next to someone else with a face almost as fucked up looking as hers. Remember her smash role in "Mask" starring Eric Stoltz? How about her chart topping hit, "I got you babe" with at the time hubby, Sonny Bono. There are so many questions that come to mind when I gaze upon this picture worth a billion words. Like, what the fuck is Cher wearing? It's like Cher was Gaga before Gaga was Gaga... was she ahead of the curve or was she just so far off in left field that not even people who were on a steady diet of acid and dorritos could grasp it? Who knows? So, let's get to the point here... What's up with this retard? The only reason I refer to her as that is because the only sense I can make of this picture is that she was a Make A Wish kid and chose to meet Cher as her wish. What kind of person would want to fucking do that? A retard, that's who. So, even if she didn't look like Corky from Life Goes On, I'd still judge her the exact same. Also, is she just a tardy, or is she a midget too? A midget tardy... life just isn't fair. And what's up with those teeth? I know I got fucked up teeth too, but if I were a make a wish kid, I just wish for new teeth. Fuck Cher, the woman has much allure as a wolverine with genital herpees. And where the fuck are they? It looks like a general cubicle in any general office. Congratulations all at Dickhead & Ascociates Collection Agency Calling Center... We're about to announce our employee of the month and to do so, we found the biggest, washed up Z-List celebrity in her 30th century space garb to deliver the plaque! Here you are, I hope your lives are better now.

Dodging all bullets and pulling no punches, Slim!

Email all WHAT THE FUCK photos to SlimTheCool@gmail.com

Follow me on twitter @notorious_slim

Little Man's First Xmas.

So I haven't really made a legit blog post since my son was born, so I figured I would do so now. This blog is dedicated to Silas to capture his first Xmas ever as a tiny little human being. Here is our subject with his mother. Let's see what cooky adventures he gets himself into.

Here is our hero with my Dad, Mick. A lot of people get all amped up to take pictures of their kids when they're all happy and smiling. That's cool and all, but I seize the opportunity to capture the little amigo at his worst. There will be a time in his life where he wants something and I'll be able to resort back to these files and be able to have photographic evidence of him being an asshole. You can consider this the ace up Papa's sleeve.

That's right, keep getting buck. Daddy and his camera are watching.

Silas and Courtney's mom, Shannon.

Silas opening gifts with my mother, Doris, whom I just found out this year that she does not like to be called, "door ass". Who knew?

Once again, our hero is caught being a jerk.

black cement steeze.

Bo Jackson wore these in the early 90's before he broke his hip. I wear them now and kick and equal amount of ass. Like every day is Super Techmo Bowl.

Little dude got some white cement to match his Pops!

He doesn't always fuss. Sometimes he's really cute.

But other times...

Big man doing big things. Like sitting semi-upright and pretending like he's going to unwrap a gift.

Even though his shirt reads, "cool like dad" which is clearly true... I didn't put him in it expecting people to take it seriously. Congratulations Silas, you're internet famous letting the world know, involuntary,

And that is one day in the life of our hero.

New Slow Dance Video "Fever Sleep" and Album Release Show!

Fever Sleep!

Make sure you check out Nectar on the 25th for the Album Release!

Slow Dance!

Melter.

Vampin'.

Low 5

Watch, enjoy and come see us tomorrow night at Neumos! We play at 7:45 and this show will most likely sell out so make sure you're in the building early! Bip!

-Eyeball!

Pictures of ME Doing Cool Shit.

Have you ever had your picture put on a shirt before? Well, I have. So, that makes me cooler than you. Put Dolbee and baby-nuts Chang in that category too, because it was this pic.

I have cool dance moves. Cooler than you anyway. And that was 5 years ago. Imagine how much I've gotten since then.

Yep. I was raised by wolves. I don't know any better.

And this one speaks for itself.

Rainfest 2009!

And there we have it! How'd you like that entry?

Over and Out!

Someone told me since this is exclusively MY blog, that I don't have to sign my name after every entry. Fuck off, I do what I want.

Someone's trying to kill me, man!

Do your self a favor and enlighten yourself on this classic flick from 93, Deadfall starring Nicholas Cage. Easily his best performance outside of Face Off. This performance was out of this planet amazing and can never be topped. If I ever made a film, I would hire cage to play this same character in the form of 5 separate roles. The real deal. Go on, what are you waiting for? The best 9 minutes and 21 seconds of your life awaits!

ASAP ROCKY

So it's not often that anything current impresses me and not to even say that Asap Rocky is doing anything ground-breaking, but I am really into this. He's breathing a little bit of fresh air into the stagnant hip-hop game right now with his unique spin and dead-on, calm, cool and catchy flow.

Impossible to pick a favorite from the guy. The whole tape bumps.

Song is so dope that the poor quality, uncreative, sloppy video can be over looked.

Now this is a rad, well done video. Like honestly, I'd like to see anybody fuck with that bike scene! From the Jeremy Scott Adidas to being blackscale'd the fuck out... dude has got that purple swag!

I'm a fan, bitch.

1986!

So, you ever get pumped up on something when you're like 5 years old and think it's the best thing you've ever seen? Yeah, happened to me in 1986. Yep, I was 5 in 1986, do the math, Sherlock.

Being 5 years old and not getting the reference that Ronald Reagan wasn't actually a cowboy that road a dinosaur... I was pumped up. Actually, I'm writing this to talk about let downs. Do you know how much of a bum out is was to actually see the real Ronald Reagan and have him not live up to the antics in which Genesis portrayed in this 1986 classic. Actually since we're on the subject, I was really let down to see that Genesis were much more weird looking in real life. Here's to being eternally bummed. Enjoy!

London Riots!

This is on it's way to becoming my favorite image of all time.

Old Timey.

Occasionally Perfect

NFL Grants Michael Vick Permission To Flip Off Atlanta Fans, Press

How Can She Slap?

It's almost embarrassing how many times I watched this and the close attention that I gave to it. This dude is a little bitch and I'm glad the leather vest host really gave it to him and made him cry. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not all up in arms that he slapped that chick. She never should have hit him to begin with, so I don't blame him for hitting her back. The reason I call this dude a little bitch is because the only person he stood up to was the woman. Seriously, guy? You got balls to slap a chick, but then you cry when someone disagrees with that? He didn't even fight back when leather vest handed him the chin music. What a total pussy. Fuck that dude, but praise to him for providing me with entertainment.

Hoiw can she slap? How can you cry?

Old(er) Photos

Just sifting through some old photos Dave and myself uploaded on the shop computer. I figured that some of you may get a kick out of the last year and a half or so of our lives. So, here it is, in no particular order!

I'll do my best to explain some of which that is happening in these pictures, but most of it was a blur back then and remains so to this day.

Fice, 4Loko and me on David's 28th Birthday!
(June '10)

Dave's 28th birthday!

Handicap Slim
(May '10)

Dave didn't take this picture, but I want everyone to know that there is
NO COUNTRY FOR THE PUKESTER!

In a perfect world, just some whiskey and a gun.
(December/November '10?)

The shop the day before opening.
(December '10)

Myself and Dave at the Blue Sky Black Death show in September.

starting to look like a real store!

True Love?

Coming along!

Ask how well walking through the mall at midnight dressed like this and carrying a stick works out.

Masumi!

Here is a VERY RARE photo of me helping out with loading at an Ill Intent show in November.
Construction continues!

No one can explain this one. We do know that it was from the Das Racist show at Chop Suey in November. Jen, Fice, Dave and Ian

This may be the reason the previous photo was a mystery
(take note, all 4loko related pictures were of the OLD formula. We don't touch that new stuff)

Loko 4 Life!

Noticing a trend?

Just Rashaad and a semi automatic machine gun. No big deal.

Humble beginning. The building starts.

Fice, Jen, Ronnie, Dave and Me and the BSBD show.How is this ever going to look like a store?

Gearing up to start building the shop!
(Early November '10)

Get buff or die trying!

Dave's shoes stacking like Tetris pieces

Erik, Ace and myself busting up the old shop.
(June '10)

The Defam package showed up!
180 pounds. Bip!
Courtney modeling.

Courtney Sleeping.

We all remember New Year's Eve... except for me. Thanks to my good friend, Jameson.

My 29th birthday in St. Louis.

And, I think we get the point by now.

If you haven't already formed your opinion about us, you're probably doing so now and I'm alright with that. The Last year and half of my life has been a lot of fun. A lot of ups and downs and I definitely wouldn't change a thing. From working hard on tearing down the old shop, building the new store, touring, partying and everything in between untill now. I hope you enjoyed.

-The realest, Slim.